2 Tips To Feel Better If Your Boyfriend Ignores You
I know how it feels awful when you have to admit, “I think my boyfriend is ignoring me.”
Especially if you just reached out to your boyfriend with a text or call and he not only doesn’t answer immediately, he doesn’t respond even an hour or more later.
It comes off as though he’s flat out ignoring you.
Let’s go back.
All is well and you decide you just want to hear his voice.
For a moment, you think, “Maybe I shouldn’t call him. Maybe I should wait.”
Then you get those thoughts of “But I’m a modern woman—no harm in me calling first.”
So off you go…almost so quickly you can’t stop yourself.
You’re feeling Cosmo magazine bold.
You call him.
You leave a message.
No call back.
Actually not silence. Death silence.
You start beating yourself up in the boxing ring called: WHY DID I THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO CALL HIM?
Since he’s not there, (of course), you box yourself for a few quick rounds of:
…feeling idiot like,
…with a few upper cuts of “you know better,”
…to finish it off with the knockout punch of “this always happens to me!”
With head hanging low in feelings of embarrassment, and heart-blood oozing, you stumble out of the ring donning the robe of “Whatever. I’m cool. Doesn’t matter.”
Of course, it does matter.
He’s your boyfriend and he’s not answering your call and he’s ignoring your voice message.
You feel the ache of the death silence throughout your entire being.
As women, it feels so very frustrating when we want to make contact with the guy we really like, to get a high off of that connection, and yet he never seems to have the time or the inclination to return our calls or texts.
Instead of beating yourself up, you start to conjure up and daydream of punishments to teach him a lesson to NEVER TO IGNORE YOU AGAIN.
And I know you can be creative. It was ingrained in you as a young child.
Don’t believe me?
Watch my coaching video where in the middle of the video is a 6 year old girl who uses her creativity to devise highly inventive ways to punish a guy who doesn’t call a girlfriend back.
What if you could feel fantastic in those moments of desperation and urgency and…maybe bring him closer even if he’s on the other side of town?
Wouldn’t that feel refreshing?
Walk with me to the pool where you are loved…
We are raised in a society that teaches us girls the worst strategies for dealing with life, with men, with ourselves.
Anything you’ve done heretofore, that felt really poopy in the aftermath, is simply from you being a good student of life and picking up the junk-ish strategies.
Like calling or texting a guy. Guys don’t like it.
They may tolerate it, making you assume the like it, but they don’t really.
They are distancing themselves when you pursue them, or using you for a hook-up and then distance.
How were you to know that calling them could have such bad results?? You couldn’t.
Guys want you to hang back and just be living your lovely life so that there is this energetic space around you that invites them to come near.
The second you break that space by going towards them with a phone call or text or stop-by, they get a little afraid, and take a big step to distance themselves.
Once you do one of those moves that it seems “every woman is doing” you are covered with poopy-strategy-residue, you feel terrible, wish you could get you could get your boyfriend to stop ignoring you, etc.
Let’s clean it all off…for you and for him.
Tip #1: Right now, step into a shower.
“Uh, Christine. I’m at work. You want me to go get in the shower?”
Step into an imaginary shower.
Really do this…it’s powerful.
It is a dry shower with sun rays beaming in from above and airy crystals that reflect rainbows of color streaming out of the shower-head.
The crystals don’t make contact with your body, but you see them as they magnetize and remove the negative thoughts, impulsive urges to connect with him first, need to control him, need to have the relationship your way on your time table, and need to make him respond when you feel panic of needing to connect.
Let the delicate crystals magnetize and pull out all those yucky strategies I just listed that make a man ignore you and wash them down the drain.
Those were the default strategies that society handed you.
They never, ever work with a masculine man in romance.
That’s the distinction. In romance.
Do you know what he’s thinking?
He’s thinking he is the masculine man and he’ll decide when it’s time to reach out to you, so why is a woman taking his job and ringing/texting him?
Yes it’s true.
Now if he’s a confused feminine-energy man, he may accept your call, but then you’ll feel unfulfilled because he didn’t call you first.
So you took the crystal shower to remove the yucky go-to strategies.
You may feel sad, now. Or feel hopeless.
I just took away your old, ripped, smelly and barely-there security blanket of “let me just innocently call him to innocently say hi and innocently HAVE HIM REMEMBER THAT I AM ALIVE.”
Tip #2: Let’s get in the Pool Where You Are Always Loved.
The water is your perfect temperature. It feels loving and liquid and surrounds and caresses every part of you.
There’s no struggle to keep from drowning. It’s a special pool.
You can move through it like an astronaut in outer space. You are suspended yet you feel the warm liquid all around you.
You feel safe. You feel free. You can float or move without effort.
You can breathe.
You have no thoughts (including thoughts of him).
You are not waiting for him. See my thought on this topic here.
It feels so good to feel this love caressing you.
This is what a Heart Heroine does.
She gets in that pool when she needs to feel love and connect with her feminine self to avoid any buried urge to call the guy.
And if you are near an actual body of water, go get near it or in it.
Water has an amazing soothing quality for us when we feel out of love with ourselves and this article may be interesting.
She’s smart. She chooses to save herself from any guaranteed heartbreak.
Because calling a guy (it’s his masculine job to call you) and shedding your feminine self to become the guy and call him always leads to awkward aftermaths.
The benefit of taking care of you first, is the guy thinks you are instantly intriguing. Tweet this.
And when you are intriguing, the masculine man will come calling.
Your take away here is this: in romance, doing almost nothing but feel the great love in you and around you will create the safe space for him to come close to you.
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